６７ Independence【Life】Dialogue with the Universe
“It is experience precious to a young person to notice "a difference between oneself and the others." It becomes the cause to go to independence. However, regrettably many people will go to dependence with reverse independence. By uniting with familiar someone, they try to negate loneliness.
The object of their dependence is a sweetheart, the best friend, or a family. Those dependence is only the means for curing one's loneliness. Therefore, the self-centered action which disregards a partner's character and goes to monopolize thoroughly is seen frequently. Or they lose themselves completely and are under the partner's thumb.
It can be said that it is just manifestation of dependence, if they would like to meet their partner every day, or desire to be together always, or want to monopolize their partner. Even if the wish is filled temporarily, it never lasts long. Because their partner are different existence from them, and they are another characters.”
“When it is in dependency, the leading role of your life is not yourself. The partner for dependence is the leading role of your life, and is governing your life. With independence, we become the leading role of our life.”・・・” Anyway, a dream cannot be realized while you have been weak lonely. That everybody take over loneliness and try hard towards realization of a dream makes possible the better human relations which respect mutual character.“
Original text: Shigeki Suwa『援助者のためのコミュニケーションと人間関係 第２版』建帛社